wrote in my journal today, just felt i want to share.
It occured to me today, something about shyness and women and sex and how I percieve women. she is beautiful, its hard to put in words but it feels as if the perception is from a lighter place. compasion and caring for her/them. respectful, gentle, kind, patient, wanting to just be in her presence. I place I believe in, a place more firm, where what I want is what she wants and feels what she feels. words cannot express as the feeeling is more then words
i have always hated words and text because it is that much harder to express feelings and emotions through them
[QUOTE=findingtheway324;46635]i have always hated words and text because it is that much harder to express feelings and emotions through them[/QUOTE]
Not if sincerely written… to the right person
Nice poem
Lovely, Brother Neil. Thank you for sharing.
I read once that shyness is just narcissism, being afraid that others have an opinion on you.
That being said, I’m extraordinarily shy.
Nice thoughts Neil. I think like you do, but then in addition there’s the “RUN AWAY!!” at the end of the thought process.
Nutmeg makes me shy, or shyer, shier, hmm. But it tastes and smells so good, this little love affair.
Two frozen bananas, one not frozen apple, 20 raw brazil nuts, about half glass of water, and of course about a third of a nut of nutmeg, all in a [B]blender[/B] to your desired texture, it may be a vegan milkshake or ice cream.
Its a great way to get shy, nutmeg has some strange attributes if done in excess. 
:oops:
I read once that shyness is just narcissism, being afraid that others have an opinion on you.
Yes, it is being afraid that others have an opinion of you, and that it is not good. Take it from a girl who was painfully shy from about the age of 10 to 15.
Not narcissism. Narcissism is having a high opinion of yourself.
My shyness did not stem from having a high opinion of myself, it stemmed from a fear that I would say or do something to look stupid and make people not like me.
Beautifully articulated Brother Neil! Love that you shared this with us.
When you allow no meaning to attach to a word (s) it often times will result in those wonderful, I am here now moments. Allowing yourself to experience whatever it is in that very moment. It’s all we have really…
As far as shyness, I don’t believe it is narcissism. I tell my kids all the time their biggest obstacle is thinking too much! Just know and do! When you start thinking too much about something you come up with all these different scenarios of how it will not work. YOu then bring in doubts and hesitation which will translate in how you come across. (not that that is always bad) And you are allowing the other person to have control over you. And honestly, that person most of the time doesn’t want that kind of control. And as I’m writing this it does echo Vipassana meditation.
Some more food for thought…When you see a beautiful woman you cannot assume she is spoken for or beyond your reach. We have placed way too much emphasis on physical beauty. And those who have physical beauty are often times unattached because men are afraid to approach them. Men think because a woman is beautiful there is no way she will be interested. If she is superficial, then yes. But I do think the majority of beautiful women are not that way. Carpe Diem I say!
The more unattainable, the more attractive.What make someone or something attractive is our own perception which can be limiting.And our own perception can be limited by how view ourselves, our fears & insecurities or where we happen to be at any given moment.
The shyness could be because of the belief that initimacy is not possible because you don’t have much to offer.
I have noticed that as i’ve got older i am less interested in the physical & more in old-er women( though i think that’s just a sign of getting older etc) and young girls certainly 20 somethings don’t really do it for me.You can get older women,okay say 50 onwards, but they can still come across as somewhat immature or cranky perhaps in some respects. So the personality is imoprtant but like you say looks are nice and i cannot say I am not attracted to physcially attractive women but I would hope there was a bit more than that and would probably be attracted to folk that had inner beauty, caring thoughtful etc etc as well. I’d be attracted women my own age or older. The twenty something girl just lacks enough life experience.They don’t really do it for me right now.But i’m more likely to catch them giving me the flirty eye and i guess i can see this and am aware of that, that kind of superficiality and the knowledge that i have, of that kind of innocence, impressionaibility etc
A I say though shyness can be because we generally feel we may have little or less to offer than the next person say. And realistically this is indeed could very well be the case for whatever reasons. But these days i find women my own age or indeed older attractive.Indeed about early 50’s.I guess there could be a slight gap but it’s not huge…by 70 they are my mother’s age and the generation thing is lost. . I am attracted to maturity. I don’t know whether that is freudian or not. But i could’nt sit with some girl and have that much depth of relationship who lacked much life experiences. It might feel more like a little sister.But that is just where i asm at just now. I think these things can possibly come & go according what influences you may have around you.
Some people say that age( i.e gaps between people) is not and should’nt be an issue when it comes to inter-personal relationships.It is how you see things,and/or what it is you may be are looking for.Men & women tend to be interested in similar things i have observed.They like their man to look attractive physically and likewise.
This is a relatively recent thing feeling attracted to slightly older( i.e mature) women but i think i’m just getting older basically.
Maturity,
intelliigence,
charm,
good looks,
some degree of sense of humour… alittle is enough… a total howler might be a bit loud for me…lol I’ve met some with that particular endearing quality.
there’s a rough list sketched… is all i can think of right now…
…it’s not really asking for much is it?
a total howler
by howler btw i mean someone that tends to laugh continuously and quite loudly… i guess they may be rather happy…
For years I was classified as shy…(believe it or not)… It wasn’t shyness but a preference to be silent…I decided to communicate more eventully because I realised it made people uncomfortable in my presence, that was the only reason. I have heard the word shy uttered many many times and never felt it was understood for what it really is.
I’m not sure if I should be saying this but I never thought an older woman ( say early 50’s) would be interested in a younger man ( say 30). I have observed that men & women are interested in similar things. I guess I was wrong.
I say “never” but perhaps i mean less likely.It just never really gave it much thought…i.e Dissmissed it, as most women that age want maturity; they do not want a 20-something usually. But i guess it could depend on what they’re after…I guess, or perhaps i should say that I’m guessing here btw…
Could depend on the individual woman though. …Attractive young men could be easy to acquire…I don’t know…I’m not a woman.
I don’t know if you’d get honest feedback here.,… but it’s welcome anyway…
Something i’ve been curious about lately…
I cann see the attractions from this point of view,maturity etc, as someone in the later end of the 30’s ball park. But the other side?? Mmmmm…lol
Suddenly the forum’s all busy…Did i just open my mouth or what…LOL
I would just echo what’s been said here before that social networking sites like facebook can be quite good for this.
There was a thread titled ‘shyness,anxiety and depression’ that came up about a month ago.I think it was Adam that suggested it.
[QUOTE=core789;50600]Could
Suddenly the forum’s all busy…Did i just open my mouth or what…LOL
[/QUOTE]
Naaaa
But I’ve piqued your interest ? 
Don’t worry. Nothing personal Karen.
[QUOTE=core789;50680]But I’ve piqued your interest ? :)[/QUOTE]
Naaaaa just my sarcasm :roll::roll: