Hi guys Im new to this forum. Over the past 2 years Ive been opening my spiritual self and have discovered a whole new side of my self. Over the past 2 weeks I have felt really good about my spirituality, Im in touch with myself like never before. I have learned to control my emotions so well, and its lead to me living a very harmonios life. however today somthings been bothering me for the first time in 2 weeks I felt a little “off my p’s n q’s” and felt a little withdrawn from myself. one of the grat benifits of these 2 weeks for me that Ive realized is ive learned how to be read vibes so well and still pay perfect attention to what goin on which is something i could never even attempt to do a month ago. However for some reason i fell off today and I felt some negative thought seep into my counsience. Thats where Im at now one thing I noticed different is when I breath through my right nostril only I can slow down and speed up the pace of my thoughts, however there are complication I noticed Im scaning peoples faces moreand when i look in the their eyes its I strongly prefer the right eye. Ive been trying to even out back to the left nostril but it feels weird emotionally and my thought patern slows down.any feedback or advice? Also as far as masturbation goes 2 weeks ago I quit masturbating and I feel its benifited my creative ability? Will my creative ability increase the longer I stay clean from it? Also I find when I look into a girl eyes I immediatly block out the feel of lust from my mind. However with this I also find a difference in my thoughts. Everytime I feel the energy of sex, right when a sexual thought comes up I cancel it out. I find Its helped me be so in control of my emotion but sometimes I feel like Im being to hard on myself , like in other words I thought about sex in 2 weeks ive always blocked it out of mind. Am I being to hard on myself? Also can marijuana increase spiritual awareness if used properly while staying abstient from masturbation? I know these are some out there quest but these are serious issues to me that I need insight with and I would appreciate people who feel they have honest insight to give it, and if not thats ok too. Thankyou
A lot is going in your post.
Still, I like it as the confusion and load of data structure says a lot about the state you are in.
I see you try to realize celibacy. It should be done step by step. It is not advised to stop sexual thoughts, it is enough to be aware of them and direct your attention to another thought or feeling if you are not rady to follow them at that particular time. The notion of stopping implies adversity.
You want to be celibate so you increase your creativity. This will happen, but it is not easy. It is not that hard either.
You are dead in everything you give up. So giving up sexuality makes you dead in that area. Not good. It is there for a reason. It is not an enemy.
I’d advise: Create realistic goals in your sex life. I am not sure if you are single, also I am not sure if you are male or female. Because these two are very different, my advise will go as if you are a male, I do not recall my womanhood well enough. 
For males, loss of semen means vitality loss. But nature is very generous. The amount of reproductive energy is huge. Vitality levels vary. So the first is to find a balance between frequency of orgasms and your vitality level, and the nature of your mind. Refraining from sexual activity is ojas building if paired with a well structured sadhana (diet, asana, learning, meditation).
If you lack a partner - as making love with someone is supposed to be better - you should try to cultivate the feelings of love and care for yourself. As Woody Allen said, masturbation is making love with the person I love the most. But it does not have to be you, it can be someone else you love, if the love is genuine, and not just lust. Feel free to fantasise, if you do it make it a pleasant experience where there is not just lust, but devotion, gratitude, and warmth. Take your time.
This way, the same thing happens what happens in diet. You increase quality and decrease quantity. Your “taste” becomes more refined in time, and physicality will become less and less part of the whole process. This also means that more satisfaction, more time until you get “hungry” again. In time you’ll learn to direct the feelings evoked by sexual thoughts and sensations into emotions of devotion and worship and thoughts of clarity and wonder.
I do not see a brahmachari blind and insensitive. That would mean for a brahmachari, women, and sexuality are invisible, non-existent. The brahmachari sees better. He/she sees bliss in everything, he sees motherhood in a womans hips, and does not fall for the beautiful lure of the instinct.
So, in short, it is good to practice brahmacharya, or celibacy, step by step, first enriching the experience by sattwic thoughts and feelings, that will naturally drop it’s frequency, and you will be able to achieve longer and longer periods without it, until you gain the capacity to instantly transform it into higher experiences. A slow process, takes years and years. Totally eradicating lust is only possible by Grace, by the Bliss of Self Realization. It might not happen this life. Important is to not reject it, embrace it, release it at the appropriate moments.
About marijuana, check this: http://www.yogaforums.com/forums/f16/marijuana-yoga-1618.html
I am against it. Why ? Because it gives you a high. I am against everything what gives the capacity of getting high any time you want. I am not against natural highs like falling in love. The artificial high is just as “good” but the fact that you can repeat it, makes it dangerous. It is much harder to achieve getting high by natural means, so once an easier way presents itself, man will choose it instead of the natural one, and becomes addicted. Any high is addictive. So I am for organic highs, if there has to be any. (jogging, - endorphine rush, falling in love -pehnylethylamine rush, aso … these are part of normal human experience.) Organic highs have their lows, depression, anxiety, and longing-craving. These must be experienced also, otherwise there can be no balance. Drugs mess up balance.