Creative growth

Yoga Discussion Structural Yoga Therapy
#1

Your suggestions to help me with the movement of kundalini have been helpful. I am feeling more grounded, stable and centered. What is happening for me now is that I am feeling immense sexual energy? I am having erotic dreams and lustful thoughts about men other than my husband. I must be oozing sexual energy because I have experienced a number of men coming on to me in the past few weeks.

I have been more creative than ever…poems coming, in the middle of the night at times. For the most part, I am enjoying this, and comfortable with the process. But I have never had such immense urge to act on this sexual urge. Part of the awakening has been a growing detachment to the cultural roles and rules, including marriage. However, the commitment we made in a marriage of fidelity and monogamy is something that my husband has NO flexibility with. If I were to pursue these urges, I would be doing so in deceit within my marriage. I clearly do not wish to do this. I know that you have had some challenges in this arena, and with respect for your journey, and your innocence along that journey, I would really appreciate some honest insight on your part.

Blessings to you

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Chandra on 2002-05-20 13:21 ]</font>

#2

The Kundalini takes the form of creativity and this is her nature as manifesting from the first Chakra as Saraswati. This is a natural expression of kundalini. In my guru’s (Swami Muktananda) book Play of Consciousness he talked extensively about the Kundalini appearing before him as a seductress. Once he understood She was that form and all other forms difficulties left. One needs to of course keep your commitment to marriage. This energy is for you to expand to express when appropriate with your husband and gently redirect it to restore your lost vitality.

The images are to be sat through and allowed to pass. They will all pass. It is best to focus your mind upon asking to know the source of the energy that manifests as sexuality rather than that one shade of expression. Go deeper. The Shakti is not for outward expression. So in this way open yourself to Her yet keep discrimination alive and strong.

Yoni Mudra is holding hands on belly with palms down to create a downward pointing triangle. One is to place the hands where they feel energy is or where you sense it wants to come. The hand position will help you retain energy and return it to source (yoni means source). The Yoni Mudra practice i gave you to do is for this purpose of returning you to the Source and learning to stay there contentedly. She awakens all dormant energies for their natural expression. As you have had such fatigue and chronic illness this process as you can see is restoring your lost energies. However She takes the form of what is lowest and from there will gradually fill you up to a level you can sustain. Sexual expression eventually tires one out and so you want to know what expression will never leave you. Always remember yamas and niyamas are there in support of sadhana not to be forgotten because one feels to be at the higher levels or considers themselves to be beyond morality. What you do within confines of marriage is healthy and guidance may be needed even there. But be open to husband and disregard others advances. Stay happy and healthy on all dimensions. Your practices are bearing good fruit. Eventually all that is lost will be found.