I am posting my e-mail to Mukunda here regarding how I found my living spritual guru, Amma and got my mantra diksha from Her just at the time during my tantra lesson from Mukunda regarding ‘initation’. It has been a sweet and moving experience for me. Hope whoever looking for a spiritual teacher will also find one through their sadhana.
A: It has been only a few months on these lessons and I have not felt the connection with you to ask for an initiation. Although I have been longing to realise the Divine but not thought of initiation. I am also a little overwhelmed to learn that dikshas being sold like a product in the marketplace by many through the internet and many spiritual teachers insists on a fee. I am just very uncomfortable with this, why is there a need to replenish for spiritual energy given to others.
M: It is a good discomfort that you feel. Spirituality comes from within outsiders can help us explain what happens but cannot truly give us anything except what was given to them. Persist and the right relationship will come for you. Your sincerity will draw the right teacher to you. Know that your force is stronger than theirs.
A: So far I have not found a spiritual guru to devote myself, so I am learning things here and there, trying to compare teachings when I don’t understand something. I am more interested in the teachings rather than a devotion or attachment to a particular teacher.
M: Healthy and good.
A: Thanks also for praying for me to help find a guru. In fact something seemed to have fall in place just two weeks ago. I went to Amma’s visit in London looking for some love and hug. After that day, it felt as if I was struck by Cupid’s arrow. That love in my heart lasted for days and I felt there was a protection between me and the outside world. I did not react to the irritations from outside that I used to. On that visit, I also happened to know that She would give mantra diksha on the last day. So I thought, this is what I am looking for, at the right time! I got the mantra diksa and my resolve is to always practice it with concentration. I guess it was the motherly love I wanted, something I never had since I was a baby without my natural mother. It seems as if God thought that this will be the right recipe for me. I just hope that I will re-establish that love I felt in me on my visit and make it permanent, and I feel this is what Amma wants me to work on, that Work for the Divine.
M: Wonderful story. If you wish to share such blessings with others it can go on to my second website ? www.yogaforums.com then Spirit?s Path section others can read there and benefit from learning how Shakti devi manifests. Lovely story. Deepen the blessings with commitment to your sadhana. Namaste