Lack of desire/Passion or Destiny?

Yoga Discussion General Yoga
#1

I am sure almost all of you have been through what I am am about to say. I am very much interested to know your thoughts about this and how you deal with this. Let me begin by describing my personal experience.

This may not just be about yoga but about anything that we want to achieve in life. I haven been doing yoga on and off for around 2 years. Nothing serious by just some very basic asanas and some pranayamas. But since around 6 weeks I have been doing atleast around 1 hour yoga every single day. Did not miss it even for 1 day. I made it happen no matter with even with my very busy and stressful life with all sorts of responsibilities of family that includes a 2 year old and a pregnant wife. It had not been easy for me to do it everyday; but I believe because of my passion for yoga, I kept going and going. I have decided that until I am alive, I will make sure I will do yoga each and every day of my life…no matter what.

What do you guys think about my above details? I have never been so sincere about anything in my life before the way I am about doing yoga? Is this my passion? Is this my love for something? Was I destined to do this as part of my karma?

Second Part:
Since last 3 days, something is not right with me. I didn’t feel the desire as strong as before. I felt like crap for feeling the way I felt. There could be so many reasons for this. I also had a little back ache. So didn’t wanted to do my asanas that would make the aches worse. But besides that I felt something inside me has gone. Some kind of forced that lived inside me for 6 weeks have left me. Since last 3 days, I did very light yoga for 2 days and did not do any yoga for 1 of the day. Today I am almost back to normal. What is going on? Am I lazy, I wonder. Am I crazy, I wonder. I do have a pattern to be very passionate about things for a short duration of time and then lose interest just like a kid. But trying to understand if you people experience this as well, at least to some level. I am thinking hard what is going on and get all kind of answes but nothing is convincing. I also fear what if I am not able to do yoga? I don’t want to stop it. Based on what I understand of it so far, this is the ultimate truth. I want it to be part of my life. I fear what if I am not destined for it. Is it my weakness? My will power? My laziness?

Thoughts?

#2

[QUOTE=yalgaar;20189]I am sure almost all of you have been through what I am am about to say. I am very much interested to know your thoughts about this and how you deal with this. Let me begin by describing my personal experience.

This may not just be about yoga but about anything that we want to achieve in life. I haven been doing yoga on and off for around 2 years. Nothing serious by just some very basic asanas and some pranayamas. But since around 6 weeks I have been doing atleast around 1 hour yoga every single day. Did not miss it even for 1 day. I made it happen no matter with even with my very busy and stressful life with all sorts of responsibilities of family that includes a 2 year old and a pregnant wife. It had not been easy for me to do it everyday; but I believe because of my passion for yoga, I kept going and going. I have decided that until I am alive, I will make sure I will do yoga each and every day of my life…no matter what.

What do you guys think about my above details? I have never been so sincere about anything in my life before the way I am about doing yoga? Is this my passion? Is this my love for something? Was I destined to do this as part of my karma?

[U][B][I]I dont believe there is any set rule on what one must do, if you do no yoga and just live happily and spread love, is there a higher life to be lived? [/I][/B] [/U]

Second Part:
Since last 3 days, something is not right with me. I didn’t feel the desire as strong as before. I felt like crap for feeling the way I felt. [U][B][[I][/I]why beat yourself up for having a feeling? For me I have never had a crappy day where a good one di not follow[/U][/B], [/U]

There could be so many reasons for this. I also had a little back ache. [U][B][I]how abut this reason, you did not feel like it, plain and simple, you choose not to[/I][/B][/U]So didn’t wanted to do my asanas that would make the aches worse. But besides that I felt something inside me has gone. [U][I][B]feelings come and go, yes? Do you always feel patient with your child, wife? As a school teacher I do not always feel patient, so I handle it as best as I can during those time[/B][/I]s [/U]Some kind of forced that lived inside me for 6 weeks have left me. Since last 3 days, I did very light yoga for 2 days and did not do any yoga for 1 of the day. Today I am almost back to normal. What is going on? Am I lazy, I wonder. Am I crazy,[U][I][B]well to be honest, yes you are crazy, but hte secret is, your not the only one :wink: [/B][/I] [/U] I wonder. I do have a pattern to be very passionate about things for a short duration of time and then lose interest just like a kid. But trying to understand if you people experience this as well, at least to some level. I am thinking hard what is going on and get all kind of answes but nothing is convincing. I also fear what if I am not able to do yoga? [U][I][B]then the whole world will end[/B][/I][/U] I don’t want to stop it. Based on what I understand of it so far, this is the ultimate truth. I want it to be part of my life. I fear what if I am not destined for it. Is it my weakness? My will power? My laziness? "[U][B]your just a booty head like the rest of us[/B][/U]

Thoughts?[/QUOTE]

some thoughts from this perspective, I am sure other posters will be adding their wisdom, were all in the same boat
with love
Brother Neil

#3

I practice yoga everyday for the last 11 years! At first I when it seemed I’d have to find some weird place because I was travelling I’d get a little ‘concerned’ until I found the right spot… or got up before everyone else… this is abhyasa - founded in the practise - like a virtuous circle.
It can seem for many, and also ourselves that a yoga practice is somehow a selfish thing to do, but it’s not like that… if we don’t have energy how can we help others?
My practice is not one that is set in the stone, I do a short ‘going inwards’ some warming up exercises for my body, mind and breath perhaps some om and then asana, shavasana, pranayama and perhaps a 15 min meditation… often I feel very creative and try to feel what it is my body is asking me to do, do I need to stimulate myself energetically or do I need to soften up, where is the tension in my body? what can I loosen? ecc.

As for doubts, they are littered along the path, they are moments to help us re-evaluate the practice and to work out if it’s still working for me or not.
Regularly following a qualified master is essential unless you’ve unleashed the power of your inner guru!
om namo shivaya!

#4

“To do yoga” is a vast statement. I do yoga every day. Asanas maybe not but yoga, yes. Yoga can be in a lot of different lenses. Stricklty asanas (maybe some pranayama), a focus on the relgious aspects, or a lifestyle choice. I veiw my practice as a lifestyle choice and the grounds of my spirtuality. I TRY to make my lifestyle as yogic as possiable (this can be diffcult running my own buisness, being a single mom, and juiggling two toddlers).

It’s great to be zen tranquil and turned inword for a few hours but make sure it dosent stop off the mat. :smiley:

Lots Of Love

#5

First, I think that, if you practiced asanas every day for six weeks, thats pretty good. Asanas are physical exercise, and sometimes the muscles get tired and need a little rest. You have to pay attention to what your body is telling you. Ashtanga people do not practice on moon days; i.e., full moon and new moon.

As for other things that might be going on, its good that you are questioning yourself, but you also have to find the answers yourself. You need to be brutally honest, but don’t beat yourself up.

#6

Consolations and Desolations (to use the Jesuit terms) are part of the path – both have something to show you. Did you wonder if you were crazy when you had a great deal of passion and devotion? Probably not, but that was the other side of this swinging pendulum.
I have confidence that you will get back some passion and devotion, but in the mean time you might find something other than a feeling to keep you on the path. And that would be wonderful, to have one more motivator for your practice.

I also agree that your body, perhaps, just asked for a break, and your yoga is strong enough that you paid attention. As Bridgette mentions, this isn’t particularly time off from Yoga. You still get to self-study, be truthful, and recognize the significance and goodness of everyone – including yourself.

The feedback loop of “I felt like crap for feeling the way I felt” is a trap. Please forgive yourself, and be open to the real possibility that things will get better again. They may or may not get back to your 6 weeks of intense high, and that’s OK. Breathe, play with your kid, kiss your wife, and keep your mat handy. It’s all one life, and you’re in the middle of it. It’s a beautiful place to be when you aren’t distracted by the traps.

#7

Examine whether the passion was totally for yoga-from my personal view-yoga feels good everytime and always gives good back for effort given. If not, perhaps the passion for yoga was in part an escape from other responsibilities. I enjoy that myself but try to take care of what in yogic terms are a " householders" responsibilities, i.e. wife, kids, job etc. Are you giving in those areas what would be appropriate. I have no idea and am not suggesting the above as relating to you… just threw it out to see if you’d pick it up. namaste.

#8

Based on what I understand of it so far, this is the ultimate truth. I want it to be part of my life. I fear what if I am not destined for it. Is it my weakness? My will power? My laziness?

I’m pretty sure that we’re all destined for it. If you want it, go for it!
There have been many times where I restarted the same path with intensity and then drifted away, only to come back again and again. I set guidelines, practiced certain ways, had all these rules… and was despondent every time I failed at my high aspirations. LUCKILY, every step forward is a step in the right direction, and every step backwards is a lesson. This experience is part of the plan, and it will teach you about yourself. Remember, change is a process, not an event!

Do not worry if your asana practice stops for a few days, a month, or eben a year. Practice as you are able and be gentle with your body. If you are aching, take rest and return again when you can; but don’t be too harsh on yourself for skipping practice. You have a job and family, so you have an awesome opportunity to incorporate your yoga into every day life! Practice patience, honesty, non-judgment, non-harming, compassion, awareness – the possibilities are too many to count. See how lucky you are to be in the life you have been given! Embrace every moment of it!

If this is meant to be your time to reach this destiny, then it will be. If it isn’t, worrying about it will not change a thing. Relax, be aware of what you are feeling, surrender to life as it is, and the truth with come to you and you will know for certain.

Best wishes!

#9

I am 56 and remember the passion that drove me as a younger man-it was turbulent-up and down and all around, and I can tell you that a gentle flowing stream of effort gets results better than an impatient Nirvana Now attitude, Buddha’s resolve under the Bhodi tree notwithstanding. In fact, I believe, the more you grasp for perfection the further you will be from it. That doesn’t mean that elevated consciousness is only for the older people on the path but give a nod to life’s natural maturational force; as with infants, we can’t walk until our bones are ready and we can’t talk until our larnyx is. Our core commitment to yoga will not admit the possibility of setback- that’s just the way it seems-maya-like waves upon the shore you’ll keep coming back-it’ll happen-have faith. namaste