Making Mountains out of Molehills

We have all made too much of something and later realize it. But what happens to those negative, destructive thoughts we have when we are ‘over’ them? We aren’t over them, according to B.K.S. Iyengar in his latest book, ‘Light on Life.’ We are constantly making little mounds of annoyances that disturb our mind and are the cause of much discontent, not to mention, tragedy.

On a personal level, when the actor Phillip Seymour Hoffman died recently, I felt cheated of the presence of his life, though I never met him. I cannot imagine what those who loved him dearly must have felt. He was a gifted and inspired artist but had allowed himself to be torn and ravaged by desire and toxicity.

His death was a good reminder that what goes on inside the mind of others is a mystery…until we reach the state of Samadhi where we are able to access ‘reality’ as it is in all things.

He seemed very calm and happy; of course Heroin will do that. But what goes on in our own minds certainly should not be a mystery, and for me, that is the main purpose of Yoga?.to shed light on my Self, to become the bright light I really am. Or am supposed to be.

I was never a huge fan of Iyengar, but it seems the years have truly ‘ripened’ him into quite the guru. In this book, Iyengar gives a simple example of how our mind works and just what many of us, like Hoffman, are trying to overcome in our daily lives, on varying levels of disturbance. Addictions don?t have to be physical as we all know; we have negative thought patterns and behaviors that don?t serves us well but we keep serving them!

Like most Yogi?s, he uses a lake to describe the mind. Thoughts, like the agitated, restless ones that Phillip must have had are like pebbles we throw in the middle of this lake causing ripples upon ripples of turbulence.

The movement caused by the ripples on top slowly trickles down, making mounds of sand on the bottom of the lake. These mounds create a lake with constant ripples, since any movement of water which moves up over the mound will show as a ripple on the surface.

We are aware of the first pebble such as ?I want a cigarette? but the secondary ?wave? of thoughts we usually do not ?catch? until we are in full swing of throwing that pebble, ie;, smoking that cigarette. These might include guilt, desire or shame and these little thoughts, unbeknownst to us, trickle down from the pebble and create a ?I am a failure for wanting a cigarette? mound of sand on the bottom of the lake.

Yoga will help us put a space between that first pebble and mountain we are creating in our turbulent mind. Every thought we don?t want to have, and therefore ignore, trickles down and makes mountains out of molehills and we are left not being clear headed enough, with such a murky lake, to see the connection between the first pebble and the giant mound making ongoing ripples in our mind.

Our state of mind can be happy, calm, clear and as peaceful as a pond without any movement when we ?digest? each present moment as it comes. We do this when we practice an Asana and relax into it. Thoughts will always come because that is what mind does but if we can learn to be the witness of these thoughts, just as we are a witness to our body, letting them come and then go…and then we stop throwing pebbles in our lake! We put a space between our thought and the action of throwing the pebble like we put space between our joints in our daily asana practice!

One has to use the practice of Asana and Pranayama to still this agitated mind in order to finally be ready for meditation. In fact, all Masters of Yoga agree that one cannot meditate until the practice of Asana and Pranayama have been mastered.

But we don?t lose heart because the immediate benefits of both Asana and Pranayama are so gratifying that we do not feel anxious to begin something we are not ready for; we know that ?When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.?

As for now, we really have to start working on those mole hills at the bottom of our lake before they become mountains. Time for practice!

Wanting the world to be something other than it is = disturbance (mind).

Exert from “I AM THAT” ~ Maharaj Nisargadatta

Q: I studied the philosophy of Yoga and it did help me.

M: In what way did it help you? By what signs did you conclude that you have been helped?

Q: Good health is something quite tangible.

M: No doubt it is very pleasant to feel fit. Is pleasure all you expected from Yoga?

Q: The joy of well-being is the reward of Hatha Yoga. But Yoga in general yields more than that. It answers many questions.

M: What do you mean by Yoga?

Q: The whole teaching of India – evolution, re-incarnation, karma and so on.

M: All right, you got all the knowledge you wanted. But in what way are you benefited by it?

Q: It gave me peace of mind.

M: Did it? Is your mind at peace? Is your search over?

Q: No, not yet.

M: Naturally. There will be no end to it, because there is no such thing as peace of mind. Mind means disturbance; restlessness itself is mind. Yoga is not an attribute of the mind, nor is it a state of mind.

Q: Some measure of peace I did derive from Yoga.

M: Examine closely and you will see that the mind is seething with thoughts. It may go blank occasionally, but it does it for a time and reverts to its usual restlessness. A becalmed mind is not a peaceful mind. You say you want to pacify your mind. Is he, who wants to pacify the mind, himself peaceful?

Q: No. I am not at peace, I take the help of Yoga.

M: Don’t you see the contradiction? For many years you sought your peace of mind. You could not find it, for a thing essentially restless cannot be at peace.

Q: There is some improvement.

M: The peace you claim to have found is very brittle any little thing can crack it. What you call peace is only absence of disturbance. It is hardly worth the name. The real peace cannot be disturbed. Can you claim a peace of mind that is unassailable?

Q: l am striving.

M: Striving too is a form of restlessness.

Q: So what remains?

M: The self does not need to be put to rest. It is peace itself, not at peace. Only the mind is restless. All it knows is restlessness, with its many modes and grades. The pleasant are considered superior and the painful are discounted. What we call progress is merely a change over from the unpleasant to the pleasant. But changes by themselves cannot bring us to the changeless, for whatever has a beginning must have an end. The real does not begin; it only reveals itself as beginningless and endless, all-pervading, all-powerful, immovable prime mover, timelessly changeless.

Q: So what has one to do?

M: Through Yoga you have accumulated knowledge and experience. This cannot be denied. But of what use is it all to you? Yoga means union, joining. What have you re-united, re-joined?

Q: I am trying to rejoin the personality back to the real self.

M: The personality (vyakti) is but a product of imagination. The self (vyakta) is the victim of this imagination. It is the taking yourself to be what you are not that binds you. The person cannot be said to exist on its own rights; it is the self that believes there is a person and is conscious of being it. Beyond the self (vyakta) lies the unmanifested (avyakta), the causeless cause of everything. Even to talk of re-uniting the person with the self is not right, because there is no person, only a mental picture given a false reality by conviction. Nothing was divided and there is nothing to unite.

Q: Yoga helps in the search for and the finding of the self.

M: You can find what you have lost. But you cannot find what you have not lost.

Q: Had I never lost anything, I would have been enlightened. But I am not. I am searching. Is not my very search a proof of my having lost something?

M: It only shows that you believe you have lost. But who believes it? And what is believed to be lost? Have you lost a person like yourself? What is the self you are in search of? What exactly do you expect to find?

Q: The true knowledge of the self.

M: The true knowledge of the self is not a knowledge. It is not something that you find by searching, by looking everywhere. It is not to be found in space or time. Knowledge is but a memory, a pattern of thought, a mental habit. All these are motivated by pleasure and pain. It is because you are goaded by pleasure and pain that you are in search of knowledge. Being oneself is completely beyond all motivation. You cannot be yourself for some reason. You are yourself, and no reason is needed.

Q: By doing Yoga I shall find peace.

M: Can there be peace apart from yourself? Are you talking from your own experience or from books only? Your book knowledge is useful to begin with, but soon it must be given up for direct experience, which by its very nature is inexpressible. Words can be used for destruction also; of words images are built, by words they are destroyed. You got yourself into your present state through verbal thinking; you must get out of it the same way.

Q: I did attain a degree of inner peace. Am I to destroy it?

M: What has been attained may be lost again. Only when you realize the true peace, the peace you have never lost, that peace will remain with you, for it was never away. Instead of searching for what you do not have, find out what is it that you have never lost? That which is there before the beginning and after the ending of everything; that to which there is no birth, nor death. That immovable state, which is not affected by the birth and death of a body or a mind, that state you must perceive.