Meditation vs talking

Mindfulness Meditation
#1

I have been meditating a lot more lately, as part of my yoga practice and also in isolation from asanas.

I am noticing I’m not so intrested in general people talk/chit chat/gossip ect. It appears friends/family only want to talk all the time about one thing or another. I may appear disinterested but I’m starting to prefer the silence.

I’m beggining to feel all this talk can sometimes be a waste of energy, some people think somethings wrong if I’m not talking but its quite the opposite!

Any tips on how I can enjoy the inner silence when in a room full of people or do others just take part in the continous flow of ‘talk’

Is there a way to encourage comftable silence without asking a person to ‘shut up’ politely ?? Hehe

Whats your thoughts ?

Thanks

#2

[QUOTE=yogidog;81316]I have been meditating a lot more lately, as part of my yoga practice and also in isolation from asanas.

I am noticing I’m not so intrested in general people talk/chit chat/gossip ect. It appears friends/family only want to talk all the time about one thing or another. I may appear disinterested but I’m starting to prefer the silence.

I’m beggining to feel all this talk can sometimes be a waste of energy, some people think somethings wrong if I’m not talking but its quite the opposite!

Any tips on how I can enjoy the inner silence when in a room full of people or do others just take part in the continous flow of ‘talk’

Is there a way to encourage comftable silence without asking a person to ‘shut up’ politely ?? Hehe

Whats your thoughts ?

Thanks[/QUOTE]
I am having an experience like that, but in reverse atm.

What helped me a lot back then, was being able to ‘disassociate’ my levels of conscious awareness.

Putting it very simply, you are just playing an interactive video game with the universe, nothing more.

Being able to be the ‘observer’ of your actions…watching your thoughts with total mindfulness…

That always helped me meditate in crowded meditation halls when everybody had the flu anyway. lulz

#3

Allow me to share my humble opinion:

Every state has its own functionality.
If you want external serenity and peace of mind, dont go to a social event.
Meditation is not only sitting crosslegged within a serene setting.
Meditation is the art of letting go, being dynamic and flexible.
Clinging to a particular meditation-environment in a social event, wouldnt make sense imho…it would be more like a rigid desire.
You can absolutely have fun and just enjoy yourself without restraining yourself 200%.
There is no meditation-state and non-meditation state.

The art of meditation means being in control of switching between monkeymind and singlepointed attention.
This power of moving from/to these 2 states is the most important imho.

Therefore, You can still practice this by sincerely listening to people’s stories.
Fortunately, many people are easily pleased by having an interested, full-attention listener, so you can still practice meditation (on another level though).
Yoga means union, therefore marking other peoples stories as unimportant, boring, non-spiritual or superficial is not union.

You are already an meditation artist, therefore you can receive or reject all energies which are fired upon you without any external notice or symptom.
You, as a meditation artist are in control of yourself and your environment.

As I’ve once heard a Tamil Yogi say: “Don’t become a vegetable” :smiley:

#4

I have experienced a similar feeling in social situations and have fortunately become aware enough of my thoughts to see my underlying emotion. For me, it is pride that I meditate and am changing, while I believe my associates are not. I doubt that this feeling of superiority and judgement is helpful, but on reflection I console myself that I am making progress, not linear perhaps, but on the road to greater serenity.:smiley:

Brooke

#5

Thanks for your feedback all.
Sqz that made me laugh- I know what you mean, I don’t want to become a blank vegetable.
Sometimes I feel a bit ‘thrown’ when I’ve been socializing all day, eg around lots of different people at work then meeting a friend after work then coming home and talking with husband.

Maybe I am not quite at the stag of my practise yet where I can ‘cut of from the monkey mind’ when needed around people.
I’m a bit like a big sponge some days taking all the eneries, positive and negative.
Some days in the morning after meditation I am full of a sence of relaxation and peace by the time i get I’n im like a drained old hag ;-b

#6

The problem I have at the moment, is trying to keep an interest in all the things my friends say and do too.

It’s difficult to come out of an hour of meditation, only to be phoned by a friend asking me to join them for a beer and a ‘chin wag’ down at the local pub. I ran out of ‘excuses’ ages ago and telling the truth, always leaves them cold. I just bore everybody to sleep now. lol

I just feel/felt so hypocritical about it all too…like every time I light up a cigarette or eat a hamburger.

Stuff I wouldn’t have cared about a few months ago.

I thought about it…meditated on it…this eventually led me to Narada Muni.

Narada Muni was an enlightened sage who was totally enamoured by Lord Narayana.

Narada claimed to have Bhakti and told everybody how he felt about it all (like I do) lulz…

Anyway, in the end, Lord Narayana became rather annoyed at Narada Muni’s boastful claims and came to Earth to test him…not to test his knowledge, but to actually test his total devotion and ‘steadfast of mind’.

Seeing as how you can’t really test for Bhakti, Lord Narayana put Narada Muni through many trials…like carrying a full bucket of water on his head, over rough terrain whilst keeping his mind steadfast in Bhakti without spilling a drop of water…yeah, stuff like that.

What happened, was that Narada Muni would be immersed in Bhakti only when he felt it, concentrated on it, or by other means…he failed…a great Bhakta like that failed…so I have no chance.

You can love god you can be aware of that love and He can also be with you, just not all the time…well, he IS, but you just cannot feel it all the time, because you have ‘other things to do’.

Just go with the flow I think. I set aside just 10 minutes every hour to just briefly close my eyes, slow down my breathing and just ‘be there’ for a short time, just reconnecting with god…even if I have to do that in a bathroom.

Eventually, things will happen the way they are meant to.

Om Namo Bhagavate Vasudevaya.

#7

I have always been like this. It just seems like some things ppl say are so pointless and a waste of breath like gossip.

I’ve always liked the quote that goes something like this, “a fool speaks often, a wise man; when needed”

#8

Lol yes the last thing you need after meditation is a good old gossip in the pub! Take Xmas for example , Xmas eve I had house to myself so spent most the day in meditation, mantras ect.
Xmas day we went to a relatives house where there was about 20 people adults and children all screaming, shouting, chatting. Usually I would enjoy this but i just felt the need to slip out the back door and go somewhere a bit more peacefull. It was kinda overwelming! Especially as evrybody was already drunk.

I’m sounding like the grinch lol.
10 mins of breathing excercing through out the day sounds a good idea, could help ground me. I will also read about Narada muni. :wink:

#9

Maybe it can also be helpfull to not make your senses oversensitive because of practicing too much typical closedeye-crossedlegged-serene passive meditations .
Because then during social events your senses will be easily overstimulated.
Examples of more external/active meditations could be : tatraka gazing, meditating with eyes open, listening to music, standing in certain postures for some time, playing a simple videogame, reading a book.
Total withdrawal of the external senses (prathyahara) is nice and one limb of yoga, but integrating all limbs of yoga in your life is more important imho. After all, yoga means union.
It would be strange that this knowledge of union suddenly makes your friends/social events as obstacles. Yoga promotes balance and control, therefore escapism does not really mirror with yoga imho.
Anyhow, I do recognize feelings described above, but since i focused on all 8 limbs of yoga, i have no problems with it anymore.

#10

Somtimes things like this happens to keep us on track. Sometimes we get disgusted with worldly matters. But eventually when you have stabilized it will get better. Eventually you will notice that even useless chatting can give you understanding of how the mind of others work and then you can understand your own mind better, some yoga techers also say when they teach others they they also learn better them selves. Everything is in your mind and if you see it differently you will change your approach to it. Also If you are going to help people in the future you must understand how to approach different people. But that does not mean you must start today and interact fulltime but keep it in mind.
If you feel to be on your own now, follow that as it is your path for now. Then when you are ready interact to understand how the mind works.

#11

i agree with fakeyogis (hehe nice nickname) :slight_smile:

#12

I agree with fakeyogis about keeping us on track. I am still learning everyday what the right ‘track’ is for me right now. Perhaps just surfing your thoughts and feelings is quite alright! At the same time you must remember that meditation doesn’t stop when the gong rings and what opens an accepting heart is being in the present moment and developing observer, witness consciousness. For me, I get small tastes of this.

That is why I am on this forum, real people with intrests and problems like mine.

#13

I have genuinely enjoyed reading all your replies and i have learnt a little something from you all.

Thank you :slight_smile:

#14

[QUOTE=yogidog;81316]
Any tips on how I can enjoy the inner silence when in a room full of people or do others just take part in the continous flow of ‘talk’

Is there a way to encourage comftable silence without asking a person to ‘shut up’ politely ?? Hehe

Whats your thoughts ?

Thanks[/QUOTE]

People like to talk… if you listen, only listen whey will love you! you do not have to talk:) and they soon will find out that they do not have to chat-chat neither.

My teacher said: you say something if it is True, Kind and Necessary…

Hatha yoga paprika also says do not engage in common talk:)

Good for you, keep meditating!

#15

I wonder wether those days when I feel ‘thrown and disconnected’ its almost like my soul is saying ‘ok enough outward social time, I need some attention now’. It gives me an opportunity to focuss inward.

If I was completly satisfied with my physical existance on the planet, I would never have asked the questions I am so keen on asking. I would fail to notice the sign posts.

I geuss obstacles keep us all on track and are put there for valid reason.

Some days I feel gods presence, the universe (what ever you like to call it) working with me and through me, other days I feel lost in a whirl wind in a some what crazing world.

There’s my thoughts for the day lol.

Here is part of a universal prayer I found very lovely from the bhagavad gita.

Grant us an understanding heart,
Equal vision, balanced mind,
Faith, devotion and wisdom.
Grant us inner spiritual strength
To resist temptations and to control the mind.
Free us from egoism, lust, greed, hatred, anger and jealousy.
Feel our hearts with divine vertues.

Swami sivananda

#16

I have been doing meditation for many years and it was at a stage that I really did not understand the life around me. People in pub, chatting and screaming. But after you will go through and you will enjoy people how they are, they are people so they are not perfect. I enjoy young people how they are easy going and I know that it means that you are not always reliable.I enjoy old people for their experience and I know that there are not easy going.
Take care Yogidog
Ivana

#17

I’ve come to prefer the silence too, and sometimes basic social situations make me feel like I’m living in a foreign land with people speaking an unknown language all around me. If I try to cruise along with it, I end up feeling very dis-genuine. Is that a word?

It’s curious to me how things have come to be the way they are, because in my early 20’s I was a social butterfly who rattled on about mindless crap all the time. I hosted dinner parties, had a steady stream of couchsurfers, introduced myself to anyone that seemed interesting… what did I talk about with these people? Whatever it was, I didn’t make any enemies, and all of the experiences brought me to where I am today - so that type of engagement with society, positive or negative, couldn’t have been worthless. I take the good with the bad. It’s just that many years later, I have a greater awareness of my speech and take it more seriously. It is a boon and a weight to reckon with. Thankfully I don’t have any problem being direct and well-spoken about things that I am passionate about. It was good of the practice to transform me, and even better to make it so that I find my own quirks (strengths OR weaknesses) very endearing, almost as if I am a mother cat watching the young kitten self walk smack into a wall.

And the other people? I see some people get irritated with them for not having anything better to do than blabber on, who among us evolved overnight into something so great as to pass judgement upon another’s path that we cannot see the start or end of? You haven’t reached enlightenment yet if you can’t keep that spotlight centered on your self, anyway… so if the world is too fast and you are slow, just sit back in silence for a bit and let it go. Don’t let it frustrate you. We’re all on the same highway, some people are just not driving in the fast lane. Just go around them.

#18

Meditation is beneficial for your health. It can improve your concentration, which is an important factor in productivity. It also helps reduce stress and anxiety. Meditation has been shown to lower blood pressure and improve heart health.

Meditation is a state of consciousness where there is no thinking and no awareness of the outside world. This state of mind allows you to focus on what you are doing and be in the present moment.You may think that meditation is boring or that it will take too much time to practice, but if you have ever done it before, then you know how beneficial it can be for both your body and your mind.

Meditation has many benefits for both physical and mental health. There are different types of meditation, but all have one thing in common: they require you to sit still for at least 20 minutes per day with your eyes closed, focusing on nothing but your breathing. You may think that meditation is boring or that it will take too much time to practice, but if you have ever done it before, then you know how beneficial it can be for both your body and your mind.

#19

I find that when I slow down my communication with anyone that I speak with using talking meditation, the nature of the interaction becomes more full and rich. The intimate level of interaction is so much more satisfying.

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