thnx for the replies.
Allow me to share my thoughts, which arise when i read the comments.
interestingly, bad words can be used as in:
- social mirroring /sarcasm (probably what mr. nobody described)
- cynical (telling straightforward what you think about it, true/false yes/no disagreements)
(…and probably more ways, but for now lets stick with these)
about the first: im trying to train myself to not stimulate others with sarcasm/sarcastic jokes. i’ve did some research and it can ofcoarse be fun (=unexpected), but sarcasm can leave very destructive, unconscious thoughtpatterns in the mind. Sarcasm is most often targeted at people in a negative way. Also, people can only attribute to a joke succesfully, if it makes the situation even more grim/humiliating.
Some people are even double sarcastic when its too late and they reply ‘it was just a joke’ (meaning: “I/you dont get it”) instead of ‘sorry, i didnt want to hurt you’. I went down this road myself, used to hang around people like that a lot, my conclusion is : too much tamas-energy is not inspiring and will get you nowhere 
The second: some people are proud to be cynical (“i say whatever i want”). i even tried this approach in the past and my conclusions are: this doesnt lead to yoga/union with other people and therefore yourself.
I would describe it as hypocricial separatism: “i play bassguitar in my metalband, sing ‘fuck the police and the corporate world’, and then sell my records and merchandise to my fans, and enjoy my beer which i bought at the shoppingmall”
If i think about JSK’s question: my conclusion is that always if one of above variations occur, it seems like i and the (group)conversation ‘harden up’, and prevent discussing subtle/emotional/openminded discussions/brainstorms.
anyways, i notice that (to me) inspiring people are usually people who dont indulge into extreme bad language or swearing. Their jokes are usually light, and emphasize a good aspect of a person.