I have no reason to live anymore and last week I overdosed on sleeping pills and was hospitalized. I am home now and more miserable. I will never be able to accomplish anything in life and I just want to die
death is the end to many roads. most roads meet at the point of death no?
why be in a rush to get their?
nobody has a reason to live, they create a reason to live. create a purpose.
you are stuck in heavy emotions. they say. focuse on feelings and you will sink. focuse on thoughts and you will fly.
isnt it amazing how temporary emotions are? one second we are mad, the next we are happy, the next sad. emotions and feelings change like thoughts. you posted a very short shortness. but you do not want to die, or you would have not posted such a thing, your heart is simply heavy, your spirit dragged down. if everyone felt like you are probably feeling. they would think and most likley want they same thing.
but the point is. if you felt better, if your feelings which are most likley a result of the outer world. instead of being a result of you directly. IE if you felt better would u still want death? probably not. so the key is. how to change your feelings. how to change a part of you which we are never taught to control. you can control the direction of your thoughts, why not your feelings!!! well we dont learn that trick at school now do we?!? bahaha.
thoughts and feelings are usually a result of the world impressing upon us. to not let the world indoctrinate you, but to indoctrinate yourself. is a trick in and of itself. these are simply random words. random words is all i can give you, as you gave short words.
Thanks ur right.
Its kinda liek the incubus song. If u let the world make u, it will fuk u with no
Foreplay, rest assured they’ll screw u complete til ur ass is blue and gray
If u let em make u - they make u paper mache. At a distance ur strong
Until the wind comes and u crumble and blow away.
We should make amends with ourselves.
If only for better health
And if I really want to live. Ill have to try, and remake myself.
So when I make me. I won’t be paper mache.
And if I fuk me - ILL FUK ME IN MY OWN WAY!!!
THIS WORLD IS A SYSTEM WHICH IS DESIGNED TO BELITTLE AND CONTROL.
WE ARE STRONGER THAN WE THINK. WE HAVE THE POWER TO BE HAPPY.
DON’T WORRY BOUT UR SITUATION, BE HAPPY AS U CAN. I KNOW ITS HARD, I EVEN BEEN TO JAIL AND ITS SO HARD 
I am an extreme idealist. and in being one, i am an extreme realist. for the point of being an idealist is to make the idea reality!
and exactly. I make it sound easy. it can and cant be. to make yourself, you must CHANGE yourself. wholly.
ALL SPIRITUAL GROWTH IS OF THE HEART.
that means. you can change your mind you can change your thoughts, you can be dumb and become profoundly intelligent. but you have not grown till the heart has grown. growth is change!
you must change the way your heart feels, in order to move forward at all!!
this is one of the deepest secrets.
so when you start this journey of creating yourself. remember that thoughts are the directions. but you must re creat your feelings. for that is the core. that is TRUE CHANGE.
take it like this. you felt so down you were ready to die. ive had full blown bliss every night for days " in the past". such bliss makes you desire nothing. for you have all the joy in the world that nothing can give you greater joy nor pleasure. the point? whats the difference between the two states? the heart! it was all in the feeling.
a master of thoughts is great, a master of feelings is greater!
the heart is a beast. dont become discouraged or frustrated in your attempts to master the heart, for if you do, the heart won! for frustration and discouragement came from feelings the heart had! lmao.
all true change is of the heart! all true growth is of the heart.
a trick. dont forget the heart. for on the path, we think we grow because our thoughts change. dont forget that all true change is of the heart!
it is the key. their are many emotions. thinking is a product of feeling. mind a product of heart.
the world tries to indoctrinate us. tell us what to think and how to feel. indoctrinate yourself. program yourself. create yourself. but know where you want to go.
know the rythem. hyperactivity is met with lethergy. up goes down. etc. know the balance. know that control of the heart. control of the emotions/feelings. will bring you control over your thoughts. for thoughts are the plant, the heart is the soil.
the soil is is the foundation. i hope you get it! any questions?
also. know that change can hurt sometimes. old habits die hard. thinking and feeling become habits. a habit is simply somthing that has been done over and over. habits become wired into the nervous system. breaking a habit can bring agitation in the nervous system. which can bring grumpyness, angryness, frustrations etc. agitation and its fruits. be a master of habit!!! for their is power in habit! rituals are habits. different word same thing. master your habits! dont let them master you 
its not that we are stronger than we think, we are stronger than we feel! but we are only as strong as we feel. 
Ok but bth I’m done doing things in life.
I just want to go on disability for rest of my life.
Is that ok? Because I am exhausted trying to cure my
Mental illness. And so are my parents.
Also. I have run out of chances.
Yawn.
Wha.
Sounds like the darkness had won you over. You won’t advance by killing yourself. Doing nothing. There is a place without much of what you hate.
Your job is to find it. No interest? Then the system will make you interested. BUt the road is long and hard and frought with glass and razors, and ends each time building the mountain of bones.
Why did you post this on a yoga forum? I’m going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that this is a legitimate cry for help, and that something in you thinks that yoga can help. Yoga can help some people, not everybody. It can only help if you practice. If you’re not willing to practice, then I’m wasting my time.
I’m going to give you a couple of yoga principles that will definitely help if you practice them.
The first principle is [I]satya[/I] - truthfulness. Here is what the yoga sutras say about truthfulness:
[I]satya pratisthaya kriya phala asrayatva[/I]
[I]satya[/I] - truthfulness
[I]pratisthaya[/I] - being grounded in
[I]kriya[/I] - action
[I]phala[/I] - fruit, fruition
[I]asrayatva[/I] - dependency, depend on
[B]When grounded in truthfulness, action and its fruition depend [on him (the yogin)][/B]
What does this mean to you? First of all, it means that you must be brutally honest with yourself. When you say things like, “I just want to die”, that’s a lie. When you say, “I’m done doing things in my life”, that’s not true either, and you know it. So stop lying to yourself. You must be brutally honest with yourself all the time about everything.
Second, it means that you have to take responsibility for everything that happens to you in your life. Everything. Every action comes to fruition. It’s the law of karma. Everything that happens to you is the fruit of some action, some thought, word, or deed, that you did in the past, whether in this life or in some previous life. Nothing will get better for you until you can accept responsibility for everything that happens to you. It’s not always easy to do, but it is always necessary. There is no doubt about this.
II.33 [I]vitarka badhana pratipaksa bhavana[/I]
[I]vitarka[/I] - cognitive thinking, in this context, troublesome thoughts
[I]badhana[/I] - repelling
[I]pratipaksa[/I] - opposite
[I]bhavana[/I] - cultivation
[B]For repelling of troublesome thoughts, cultivation of the opposites
[/B]
Some examples of troublesome thoughts:
I just want to die
I will never be able to accomplish anything in life
I just want to go on disability for the rest of my life
I have run out of chances
Besides the fact that none of it is true, this kind of thinking will definitely cause trouble for you. As long as you continue to think like this, you are going to engage in self-destructive behavior, either consciously or unconsciously. Eventually you will self-destruct, although maybe not in the way that you think, and maybe over a longer period of time, and maybe more painfully than you imagine. So it is absolutely necessary that you learn to recognize this type of thinking, and not only stop it, but learn to think in more positive ways. If you do this, it will definitely help, there’s no doubt about it.
Also I suggest that you try some simple asanas and breathing exercises, with the goal of simply calming your mind and emotions, so that you can think more clearly.
Thanks guys and yeh asuri I do pranayama and
Meditation every morning.
I also take kung fu and bikram yoga twice a week
Idk bout karma cuz I don’t really believe in reincarnation. And I am overall a good guy and don’t think my problems are my fault. I have a mental illness and just doing my best to get by
Btw asuri, do u think suicide is a sin? I’m not suicidal just curious what u think
Also asuri I agree with ur sig, mindfulness is important I admit my mind sint always here.
Also, I will try to be truthful with myself, but when I say I wnat to die, I really feel like dying 
Is suicide a sin? I don’t know, what do you think? For somebody your age, I think it’s stupid and wasteful.
I don’t think it is. I think its a universal right. The right to live = the right to die
And I’m sure whatever higher power can understand that I really can’t take it anymore.
U guys don’t understand but life with a mental illness is very difficult. For everyone else its really ease to point a finger at me and caste blame.
More troublesome thinking “I really can’t take it anymore”.
Pratipaksa: This weakness is my enemy, I can, I must summon courage and strength to defeat it. To endure the unbearable will be my victory, my accomplishment. Then my soul will be at peace.
asuri.
why wouldnt he post this on a yoga forum?!?
Do you shy away from the truth brutality of death?
Death is as much a part of yoga as life
Yes suicid is a sin. Living is a privilage. why do you think we all die? If living was a right, we would live forever simply through “want”
xelson. i sent you a private message. also wanted to talk about your pranayama practise.
you were brought into the world unwillingly. you will die when death pounces upon you.
karma is seperate from reincarnation.
send me a message in the private message. and we can talk more
There are forces greater than you and I.
We are all here for a unique purpose. That purpose isn’t taking our own lives. Nature will handle that all by herself when the time is ripe.
In the meantime find the joys in life or change the circumstance if you cannot, stopping short of harming yourself or another (as best you can).
Our living is made up of choices, one after the other, all day long. If you choose to remain in your current state, that is of course up to you. But it is your choosing. You may, at any time, do something else.
Mental health counseling is not something provided via a Yoga forum. Many can use the tools of yoga, imparted by a well trained teacher, when they have a wholesome intention, to heal many things - including depression.
However yoga is only effective when the student has an urge to grow, a willingness to change, effort, a sound teacher, and patience.
I notice my thinking pattern negative thinking is what gets me depresed and suicidal
So thinking I will do this technique where I think as little as poossible. Quiet my mind 24/7
Cuz even when I try to think positive, the thoughts turn around and become negative
Xelson, what happens when you meditate in those moments of negative thinking?
[QUOTE=Xelson;74343]I notice my thinking pattern negative thinking is what gets me depresed and suicidal
So thinking I will do this technique where I think as little as poossible. Quiet my mind 24/7
Cuz even when I try to think positive, the thoughts turn around and become negative[/QUOTE]
Try SAMe:
http://biopsychiatry.com/sameart.html
It helped some people really depressed. You can buy it online from
biovea.com
Was your illness induced ?
@muki: gonna work on meditating when I’m depressed
But its hard to at that time.
@oak: don’t be fooled by "natural miracle cures,"
They will only take your money.
And no, I’ve always been like this.