Maybe I just wanted to be part of the ancient Hindu beliefs/culture that was so much a part of my young adulthood.
The Hinduism in Bali, Java and Malaysia is a far different 'kettle of fish' than it's Indian counterpart...even the religions of South India and Tamil Nadu are different (being involved in Lingayat culture, as I was).
I wanted to get back to that side of it...the familiar side of it. I had enough of pomp, cerrmony and circumstance. Yes, I also had a bit of extra Karma to burn too, I guess so.
Unfortunately, modern day India is not ancient India. The India that was steeped in dharmic culture, Yoga, Vedanta and Sanskrit started dying 5000 years ago with the onset of the Kaliyuga age. At that time India was 80% bigger than it is today and was a global center of learning, wisdom, culture science and technology. Around 600BCE or so India fell quite badly to foreign invasions from the Persians, the Greeks, the Huns, the Scythians, the Kushans - it was in fact a constant war zone and fragmented into hundreds of kingdoms constantly at war with each other. Then by the later middle ages the Mughals subjugated much of India, destroyed hundreds of thousands of its temples, burnt down its universities and schools. Then in the modern age what was left of India's dharmic culture was eradicated and its memory erased by the British by abolishing its traditional education system and replacing Sanskrit with English.
The current generations of Indians are only Indians in name, but otherwise there is nothing remotely Indian about them.
I made the same naive mistake as you did of thinking I will be able to find the glorious ancient India still in India, perhaps in the Himalayas. Unfortunately the cynicism of all Indians I met who I asked about for genuine gurus and spiritual masters was correct, they are too rare to find, in fact close to impossible to find. As I said I consulted with many swamis, gurus, pandits and did not find a single one worthy - I found many charlatans, many corrupt ones and many naive ones. Even the Sivananda Ashram where I expected to find genuine masters, I instead found dogmatic monks - I might as well had been in Church
After returning from India I made my decision that I will do this by myself without any formal guru. I took the advise of one sadhu I met in India who told me to accept the scriptures as my guru, all the techniques and knowledge I need to know is in the scripture - I don't need a guru. He also added, that ethereal masters will help me and nudge me along the way, perhaps by not making them visible to me, but subtly pushing me along as long as I put the sincere effort in.