Originally Posted by FlexPenguin
To atone for my past behavior, I shall begin to post the racist things I’ve said throughout my life. Here’s one:
“Aggressiveness, lack of impulse control, lack of emotional control, lack of reasoning skills, irrationality, infantile communication skills, disregard for authority, intolerance, racism… these are just some of the typical traits of common Negro behaviour.”[/I]
[B]Listen boy. I don’t mind or care when you try to make fun of my posts. But, on two occasions you have used this opportunity to write abhorrent racial posts regarding black people and attribute them to me. I believe you feel that by doing this, you can post what you really feel and get away with it.
I’m not sure if the administrator has paid any attention to your posts, and I wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t, but I would prefer if you would return to aiming your barbs at me, and not share your views regarding minorities in this public place.[/B]
Lol, that was copy-pasted from Stormfront, a white nationalist/supremacist, Neo-Nazi website. I think the views of the people there would nicely fit in with yours (Hell, I wouldn’t be surprised if you had an account there) and those of Gori Kamini’s (and I KNOW she’s from that wretched place).
On the same note, why don’t we talk about your abhorrent racial posts about Indians and other cultural groups? I’m not sure if David has paid any attention to those, and I wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t…
Face the facts: without western civilization and Christianity, India and the vast cultures if the world would still be wrangling on or near the stone age; living, fighting and dying under primitive tribalism.
This is a good start Surya. I’ll contact A R Rahman so he can compose an upbeat score. You and Friedrich practice your dance routines (who’s the stright guy?). Leave everything to me and I’ll have you guys prancing down the red carpet come Oscar season.
May have to change the old testament theme thing a bit. Violence is good, but can you find some sexy bits? Just try to resist casting any girls under 16. I’ve read about old Hindu men’s preference for marrying the young ones. Won’t go over well out here. Round up some lower caste filthy untouchable bastards to haul the equipment around on the cheap, and we’re set.
Are child brides still condemned by Hindu law to be outcasts because they are widows? That’s not very yogic.
Here’s the synopsis:
The Hero: Surya Deva, he’s a rich boy, a spoiled brat. His mother has died and his mean father has remarried a Chritian woman. Surya often sees his mother in his dreams where she begs him to find a nice girl and settle down. When we first meet our hero he’s surrounded by scantily clad girls prancing around him in their vast garden, while white and lilac petals fall from the sky. They sing:
Āpa kē li’ē hamārā pyāra pīlē bukhāra kī taraha jalatā hai.
(Our love for you
Burns like yellow fever!)
Our hero has charms to distract the girls while dancing - singing of his dream girl.
She comes to me
Like biscuit from the cupboard
So dry at first
But dunked in milk
So white to see
The Heroine: Fraulein Freidrich (funny name for a hindu girl, but we can make it work). She is the epitome of today’s generation. Fraulein Freidrich is poor outcast from a small village, but her jewelry is designed by Tanishq. Our heroine is having a bath in the local canal when our hero sees her. Their eyes meet, heartbeats stop, music happens, everyone around them begins the choreographed dancing rountine, the camera pans a wide panoramic shot of the scene, and love is in the air!
Fraulein Freidrich sings the main theme tune:
My love for you
Lifts me up like a lever!
The Villain: (TBA) Surya’s father and his Christian wife, always spying on them from behind the doors or the trees. They sing as well:
If you marry her
We will carve you with a cleaver!
Meanwhile, one lonely night our hero is alone, looking out into the Ganges, when his ghostly mother appears to him:
Fraulein Freidrich is too brown
Why don’t you leave her?
Mām̐, maiṁ apanā dūdha liyā hai,
lēkina ēka chōṭī sī mēka’apa
Fraulein Freidrich pārita kara sakatē haiṁ wih.
(Mother, I’ve had your milk, but wih a little makeup Fraulein Freidrich can pass.)
This goes on for a couple of hours, then our villains kidnap Fraulein Freidrich and take her to a palace that has a pool filled with pink acid. Much singing and dancing there. But, our hero’s best friend urges Surya Deva to rescue the Fraulein.
If you let this happen
You will surely bereave her!
So, off they prance - the scantliy clad girls in tow - to rescue the Fraulein Freidrich from the clutches of the evil father and Christian stepmother. When the arrive, a great fight ensues with a cast of thousands. Carefully choreographed, the villains and heroes battle for another hour or so. Finally, Surya Deva rescues his Fraulein Freidrich, but as they sing to each other, they realize they cannot remain on Earth together, so they decide to jump into the pool of pink acid. As they sink, to their knees, then their waist, then their shoulders, the camera zooms into a close up and our lovers kiss passionately. The fighting stops and sun is blacked out by a swarm of parrots, their droppings falling on the villains.
But wait! It’s not over! Our lovers emerge in heaven, hand in hand (the scantily clad girls are there to meet them) and they are shown to a table full of great food by our hero’s mother. At the table are many guests, including Siva, Jesus, Allah, and the prophet MHd (have to careful there. Don’t want to make the same mistake as the Danes). Everyone is happy to see them, and the final song echoes with Rahman’s signature beat, while white and lilac petals fall from the sky.
Now you have the chance
To show her your pecker!
(note: the preceding is a parody. Any resemblance to any person or culture, living or dead, is purely coincidental. Your humble narrator’s personal views are not in any way reflected here)
“I agree with you. India is a very backward and unenlightened society that subjugates her women and restricts their rights as given to men. Hopefully the new media will awaken and enlighten the people and they will demand freedom from male-dominated, antiquated doctrine. Fingers crossed.”
"Total and utter dribble. India was very proficient at abusing her citizens long before Hannibal came traipsing over the horizon. In fact, I would venture to bet that India taught the West all they know about citizen abuse (and I know you know what I’m talking about).