Namaste chamssou15,
I understand that life in Algeria is probably very different, but there are certain aspects about human nature which are the same across the species, and I would imagine it is no different in Algeria.
In the way you write I can see you have a lot of frustration, especially sexual frustration and frustration with women. There is a lot of disappointment with socieity as well and how it is.
It is fair to say you are a very frustrated man and it comes across strongly my friend. This is the energy you send out and people you meet are receiving this energy and they respond to that energy by avoiding you, being rude to you, ignorong you.
Anyway, you asked for advice from Yoga. And here is what Yoga says:
The first step you need to take is taking responsibiliy that you are creating these conditions subconsciously. It is your own mind, nobody else that is causing these situations to happen to you.
You are reacting to the world around you constantly and causing yourself frustration. First recognise this simple fact: YOU CANNOT CHANGE THE WORLD AROUND YOU. The world does not belong to you for you to change. If you cannot accept this fact, then stop reading this post. If you accept it, then read on.
You cannot change the world around you, but you can change how you relate to the world. In order to do this start with:
- Acceptance. Accept the world as it is. It may not be as you want it, but in spite of what you want, it is as it is. You were born into this world, with the parents you have, the society and culture you are in and the position you assume in it.
I also had the misfortune of being born to bad parents, a society and culture which left me emotionally really hurt. Although I still get regrets from time to time on the world I was born into, I accept it now. I have been trying to make this world work for me the last 10 years. I have come a long way since.
If you are not going to accept, then stop reading, Yoga cannot help you if you do not have the maturity to accept your situation. But if you do, then read on.
- Make the best of what you have. Your goal in life is self-actualization. What does this mean? It means becoming the best that you can in all departments: social, physical, emotional, mental and spiritual.
You need to work on each aspect and develop it more and more. Why? Because you have no choice. This is what the point of life is about according to Yoga. Full actualization of all your potentials.
You have amazing potential according to Yoga, but you only know about 1% of that potential.
It does not depend on your budget. Making friends does not require money, it requires being able to open up to others, smile and say hello. It requires making efforts to contact other people.
I am sorry I am not going to believe for a minute that Algeria does not have social clubs, community centres, social events for you to participate in.
Your attitude is wrong. Put a smile on your face, go out and say hello to people. Eventually, start to talk to people. Ask them about themselves, they love that.
I have talked with people in UK, Germany, France, India, Holland, Spain and I have never had a problem smiling, saying hi to somebody and getting hi and a smile back.
At one point when I had no friends, I joined various clubs and groups where I met people who shared my interests and who are now amongst my best friends. We do things together regularly now. I enjoy being with them.
Volunteering at your local charity organization or helping the eldery or disabed also does not require money. Just sign up. Say you want to help. Most people do not decline sincere offers for help.
Similarly, getting physically fit does not require money. All you need is your own body. If you have some physical difficulties, then you need to take that into account when you exercise. Don’t overtrain. Don’t push yourself too much. Stay within comfortable limits.
Keep your mind active does not require a lot of money either. Go to the library and lend out some books. Go to the charity bookshop and get some books. Go online and read loads of information for free. Go to the shop buy a book of crosswords/puzzles. Aim to do one crossword a day. That will keep you going for a bit.
It sounds like though you go on youtube and skype for mind stimulation, and then you complain that it is shallow lol
You also need no money to meditate. Just find some time, sit down, let go and just remain silent.
Look there are no excuses. Get on with it.
If you accept this, then read on:
- Enjoy
Yoga is a philosophy and practice that tells you to enjoy your life, whatever you are doing. Whatever you do, immerse yourself in it. Act like there is nothing else in the world at that time. Just you and what you are doing.
When talking to people give them your full attention. Listen to them as if every word they utter is gold. Just doing this will make people fall in love with you. People love to be listened to. Invite them to speak more.
When doing the household tasks and work put all your attention in that. Enjoy it. Again there is nothing else in the world except you and those household tasks. Comprende?
Same goes for when working out, reading and meditating.
And that’s it. Does it sound simple? Good, because it is simple. Anger, frustration, anxiety, worry, grief only come when you give your mind time to think. But if you are living your life without thinking, but constantly enjoying whatever you are doing, these emotions will not come.
Look how simple your life could be. Here is what a a day in the week may look like for somebody with a full time job:
5am wake up: Brush your teeth and mouth, empty your bowels, have a shower, then do your Yoga and meditation. Then read some spiritual literature.
7am: Have a light breakfast
8am: Go outside for a light walk, smile and greet the world as you go by
9am - 5pm: Go to work
6pm: Go to the gym and work out/exercise at home
7pm: Have dinner, then relax with a book and read.
8pm: Do the required household chores and then do some hobby like drawing, music, painting etc
10pm: meditate and go to sleep
Keep your waking, sleeping, eating and meditation times the same throughout the week, or most days. The rest you can adjust and change based on your schedule. If you are constantly doing something and enjoying what you are doing, then your days will go by quickly.